TW: Mention of Self Harm
“Self harm appealed to my sadness but I didn’t let it coax me.” – S.A. Tawks
Born and brought up in Delhi and currently residing in NCR, Aishwarya is a person who is filled with an explosion of emotions inside her. Aishwarya, who is 25-year-old, currently works as a Student Success Specialist in an Ed-Tech giant. Aishwarya made it through her years with utmost patience although there were issues deep-rooted within her and needed immediate attention.
“I express too much in interpersonal relationships. I had to immediately take control over my emotional channelling so that I could prevent it from backfiring on me.”
There were a lot of situations where Aishwarya used to self harm. Self harm wasn’t something she chose for herself, but that was her way of releasing her emotions. Aishwary’s uncontrollable actions were mostly triggered by interpersonal relationships. Not that Aishwarya didn’t try enough to get rid of this habit, she tried sharing the same with her friends. But without professional advice, she couldn’t get rid of her issue as it didn’t reflect a channel to her struggles.
“I was often angry and my peace was overshadowed by nothing but stress.”
Aishwarya decided to get professional help from YourDOST through her organisation resources. She got in touch with Komal, a YourDOST counselor, who later suggested that Aishwarya might be going through a Borderline Personality Disorder.
Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is a condition characterized by difficulties regulating emotion. This means that people who experience BPD feel emotions intensely and for extended periods of time, and it is harder for them to return to a stable baseline after an emotionally triggering event.
But it was not mandatory to take medication. Hence, Aishwarya was more focused on accepting it which was important to move on. She realised that everything she experienced didn’t require action.
“I was suggested with a method where I had to suck on a lemon whenever I feel triggered or want to practise self harm. This helped me miraculously! I was able to distract myself on many occasions.”
Soon, Aishwarya was moving towards a better position in her life. She realised that many of her emotions were not rational. Her tendency to over-express herself in relationships overwhelmed her. Aishwarya had taken control of her actions and following the techniques suggested by the counselors made it easier for her.
“Therapy is a slow process. It takes time. When we are very stressed, we don’t know how to react. At that time, we should just sit and mend our mind to not get distracted from the actual task.”
Aishwarya extends gratitude to her counselors as she is on the path of recovering from her self harm tendencies. She describes her improvement with the fact that “I should not try to improve another person at the cost of my mental health.”, and indeed, we second this!
She describes her improvement through counseling as progressive and gives a rating of a solid 4 out of 5. We wish nothing but great success for Aishwarya!
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