Do We Always Need A 'Partner' To Make Us Happy?

3 minutes
Ashima is a 35 yrs old, independent woman with rocking career and wonderful finances. When she was 25, she just loved her work and enjoyed independence and money. She worked hard and got ahead in her career in just a few years. Gradually, she started feeling  lonely specially when she saw images of her friends enjoying with their husbands or boyfriends splashed all over social media – facebook, whatsapp and everywhere!
A party person that she was, started withdrawing from her friends, siblings and social gatherings, all the places that reminded her that she still doesn’t have a partner. She was then, actively looking out for someone to share her life with. Whenever she met a guy, she would be telling sobbing stories of her life, seeking sympathy –  this actually brought a lot of guys very close to her but it didn’t last long. Each one of them would leave her and move away. She did get into a few serious relationships too but none of them worked out.  She was always sharing sadness of her life and going out of her way to impress guys and trying to pamper them. She was more like a mom than a lover!
After her 3rd breakup with Avinash, she started getting depressed, couldn’t sleep and felt her self-esteem going down. It was when, she decided to seek help from our expert.
When she first met her, she was already taking sleeping pills. Our expert made her comfortable and together they listed all the issues Ashima was facing – loneliness, sadness, lack of appetite, insomnia, low self-esteem and jealousy.
Our expert started working with her step by step. Firstly, she made Ashima work on self-care.  She encouraged her to spend time with herself,  for herself.  She asked her to pamper herself  –  refresh her wardrobe, get hair done, buy new cosmetics and stock her refrigerator with her favorite chocolates. She then asked Ashima to put conscious efforts in socializing. Ashima was fond of trekking, with our expert’s helped, she joined a trekking meetup group and was out there climbing mountains every weekend. It took Ashima a while before she could do it comfortably but then she really started enjoying pampering herself.

Expert suggested her to buy gifts for herself on every occasion, remind herself that she is a special person at-least for herself.  It worked. When Ashima began treating herself with dignity, people around her also did the same. She started inviting friends and relatives over for dinners and accepting their invitations again. She was again beginning to be the life of parties. She was maintaining a routine now, giving time to herself instead of sympathy. Soon she was her best friend and yet open to people. 
She treats herself the best on Valentine’s day. She gets gifts for herself and for her dear ones. Her gestures are reciprocated.
Ashima is still open and looking for someone whose company she will enjoy as much she enjoys her own company. She has stopped engulfing herself in self pity or lowerering herself down for anyone else. She is comfortably in love with herself and can enjoy her own company.
Love yourself and people will respect you. There is nothing bigger than self love. You don’t need another  person to substantiate your worth.

Team YourDOST

YourDOST is an Online Emotional Wellness Coach. Through YourDOST anyone can Sign Up and anonymously seek advice and guidance from Counsellors, Psychologists, Special Friends, Mentors and other experienced individuals.