A famous line by Rousseau, “man is born free, but he is everywhere in chains,” holds very true in today’s fast-paced world. We may often find ourselves surrounded by speech bubbles of “Am I doing enough?” or even “What is the point of my existence?” and not know the origin of such feelings.
Humans are wired to feel various emotions, the highs and lows of life, and learn how to steer through the tides of uncertainty. So when 23-year-old Dhairya (name changed) moved out of his house to pursue his graduate study, he felt a sudden shock from the people around him.
“I was too confused to see other students doing so well than myself. So I kept getting furious at others and lost interest in any social relationships.”
Dhairya was studying at prestigious IIT Kharagpur. He described himself as a bright student throughout his schooling and was expecting the same even at IIT. The issue started to occur when Dhairya was not able to push himself to achieve his goals. He was lacking positive reinforcement and started scoring relatively fewer marks.
One day, during his second year of college, Dhairya thought to himself, “I can solve any issue; why is this taking so long? Maybe I lack motivation”. To resolve this, Dhairya tried going to the class regularly to feel better. Alas, he could not continue this for long, as he was getting anxious with each passing day. Dhairya approached his college counselor but could not begin his session due to the Covid-19 lockdown.
“I went back home and lost my mind all over again. People around me would take drugs to calm themselves down, but I did not want to choose that path. I knew about YourDOST, so I finally decided to approach them.”
Dhairya wanted to change himself for good; he tried to stay true to the expectations set by him, so he reached out to a counselor from YourDOST. Dhairya began his counseling sessions by putting all the things out on the table and let the counselor pick the issues to resolve. As the sessions progressed, Dhairya realised his train of thoughts was slowed down, and he felt a sense of decluttering.
Dhairya was asked to use Pomodoro Technique, a famous time management method, to deal with his college and classes schedule. Dhairya’s counselor also guided him to take ‘one day at a time’ and focus on his studies without worrying much about grades. As a result, Dhairya slowly started getting back on track.
“My counselor knew my queries and suggested appropriate tricks to rectify them. Such as YouTube videos and asked me to slow down on using social media apps.”
It’s been almost a year for Dhairya, where he hasn’t been much active on social media, and he feels much better this way. He can finally see himself in a new light without having a fear of being judged.
“The sessions have made me feel more present and content. I have learnt to appreciate myself even more. In one sentence, if I explain the counseling process, I would say – You must trust the process!”
Dhairya today is a confident student who has made friends without having to feel judged and can tackle any difficult situation now. Dhairya’s advice to everyone is to seek help if they want because counselors actually make an effort to listen to problems and provide solutions.
Dhairya’s Warrior Tips:
1. Patience is the key! Thinking twice before acting up and making big decisions always helps.
2. Having an unbiased coach or counselor is any day better than just talking to friends and blindly taking their advice.
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