“Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans.” – John Lennon
We often set out in life with clear plans and expectations, only to find ourselves thrown off course by unexpected events. These moments can be overwhelming and disorienting, but they also offer opportunities for growth and self-discovery.
Meet Abhilash (name changed), a 25-year-old B.Des student in Visual Communication Design at NID Ahmedabad. Abhilash describes that he has roots in a small town in Kerala.
Abhilash’s childhood and family life have been a mix of good and complicated relationships. He shares a close bond with his mother and sister, but his relationship with his father has always been complex. It wasn’t terrible, but Abhilash wished it could have been better. His relationship with his brother also wasn’t very great.
“I was always into creative things and studying design. I used to sketch a lot, but then I stopped. Now, I explore digital art.”
Abhilash’s love for creativity and design eventually led him to NID Ahmedabad. It was here that he first heard about YourDOST, the official mental health partner for his college. Here he met his counsellor, who became his mentor for the coming days.
“She was quite open to what I say because there were concerns, I was not confident to say out loud. These concerns were important to me, but I didn’t think others would understand their importance or how they affected me, but she was open to listening to me first. That’s one thing I liked about her.”
In his first year of college, Abhilash had to take a break due to a health condition. This sudden illness turned his life upside down. One week he was on campus, and the next, he was hospitalized, unable to move or eat.
“I realized that I couldn’t resume my course back on campus for the next year. After I went through the healing process everything was fine. Until that time, I hadn’t started taking counselling at all. However, later I had a bad experience with my batchmates.”
Abhilash faced bullying and isolation from a few of his ex-batchmates, who seemed to have issues with him from the first year. Right after he had to repeat the year and became their junior. One of his close friends even started threatening him through phone calls, adding to his stress. On top of this, Abhilash was dealing with side effects of his medicine and severe mood swings, which made it hard for him to leave the house for six months.
“Even though I took a medical break, and this might sound like a very silly reason, they kind of kicked me out of the WhatsApp group. I used to call them my friends, but suddenly some people changed their tone. I hadn’t done anything except fall sick and hence that’s when I started counselling.”
Journaling became a therapeutic activity for Abhilash, helping him process his feelings and thoughts. He describes it as a way of feeling good about himself.
While journaling didn’t change how people around him acted, it helped Abhilash heal and regain confidence. It encouraged him to reconnect with others and form new friendships.
“I used to hang out with people whom I was comfortable with based on where I come from and the language I speak. After I faced issues from the same group, I started trusting the people out of the community or the language I speak. I started putting up boundaries with the people who bullied me and talking with a variety of people. Slowly, I found new friends when I went back to campus.”
The combination of time off, self-reflection, and therapy helped Abhilash transition from being an introvert to a more talkative and sociable person.
“I’m grateful that my counsellor spent those few hours to sort out my whole year in my life. She didn’t completely change how I saw the world, but she influenced my life in a huge way.”
Abhilash rates himself a 5 out of 5 in terms of feeling better and envisions improvement as better communication and gaining good friends.
We at YourDOST are confident that Abhilash will have a life of growth and happiness, and we wish him all the best in his future endeavours!
Abhilash’s Warrior Tips:
1.“You shouldn’t be ashamed to seek help when needed.”
2.“When you don’t find help in one place, don’t be hesitant to knock on other doors.”
