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Do you know the process of pearl formation inside an oyster? The process starts when a tiny irritant like a grain of sand enters the oyster, and to protect itself, the oyster forms a protective layer around the irritant. Gradually, the oyster starts adding layers on top of the irritant. Similarly, when we face difficulties, we work on them to create a protective barrier which helps us grow further. The same is the story of S Rao, a 28-year-old filmmaking student at Whistling Woods International Institute.
Born in a Telugu family in Karnataka, Rao recalls having a traumatic childhood, as he became severely underconfident after a series of unfortunate events.
“I started to underperform in everything I did. I used to play professional cricket and because of my anxiety issues, I had to leave the sport. After that, I couldn’t concentrate on my education so had to drop out of formal education and went into the film industry where I worked as an editor for seven, or eight years.”
Rao has now shifted to Mumbai to pursue his filmmaking career by studying a course to learn more about it. His whole world has started revolving around movies and films and he has given up cricket altogether.
“I would say my relationship with my family is pretty minimal because though I live with my mom in Mumbai right now, our conversations are very limited. I live in my own space within my home life and she’s not aware of what’s happening in my life because of all the traumatic memories I had. Hence that kind of built an invisible wall between us.”
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Rao learnt about the YourDOST platform from his college as they have collaborated with the organisation as their official mental health partner. Here he met Ms Sagarika, who went on to become his therapist for days ahead.
“I felt extremely safe with her. I had never felt safe sharing my personal things or what I was going through in my life with anyone. However, my very first interaction with Sagarika was smooth and I felt completely safe sharing my story.”
Rao had many traumatic experiences as a young boy which completely changed him as a person and left lifelong scars in his heart. He could not share his feelings with anyone as his relationship with his family did not sit well. He was constantly bullied throughout his childhood for various reasons mostly by his family members themselves.
“I was bullied for my skin colour and my looks. I was constantly ridiculed for my language because I grew up in a Kannada-speaking state and I’m from a Telugu family. I wasn’t good at studies and was made fun of for my marks as well from childhood. I had nobody to open up to about these things.”
Rao was in a low phase for like seven, or eight years of his life and even attempted to end his life twice. He was super underconfident and the anxiety triggers kept coming back because of which he was underperforming in his field of interests as well. He realized that he needed therapy to heal himself completely.
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Ms Sagarika helped Rao with methods to form a protective layer around himself similar to an oyster with various exercises and practices.
“Sagarika helped me practise the 54321 grounding technique to regulate my emotions and channel them in a better way. I was also asked to write down my negative thoughts and address them to get through anxiety and stress.”
Before seeking therapy, Rao refrained from sharing even good things about himself as a result of the severe underconfidence that prevailed in him. Gradually, he started accepting himself, which is the most crucial aspect of one’s development. He began validating himself and stopped needing validation from anyone other than himself.
“Thank you is a very small word to express my gratitude towards Ms Sagarika. However, I’m deeply grateful to her for helping me through the darkest phase in my life. So yes, thank you Sagarika for helping me to get out of it.”
Rao is almost a completely changed man today who has emerged like a shiny pearl from an oyster, and is not afraid to express his emotions and feelings without feeling underconfident. He rates himself 3.5 out of 5 and envisions improvement as pure self-improvement.
We at YourDOST are extremely proud of his transformation and wish him all the best for his future!
S Rao’s Warrior Tips:
1.“Every bad day ends and will give way to new and happy things in light.”
2.“There is always light at the end of the tunnel, you just have to be hopeful and work towards reaching it.”