Anudhya (name changed) is a 31-year-old professional who has spent most of her life in Chennai. She works as an Analyst at Med Mira and has done all of her education in the vibrant city of Chennai. She was an ambitious person right from a young age and always dreamt of becoming a working professional and pushed herself to get there.
Her hobbies include watching movies and spending quality time with her friends.
On finishing her B.Tech in IT from a reputed college she was selected for a campus interview and got through the placement.
“It was my first job and I was super-excited. However, it was a night shift so my parents were not comfortable with it as I was the only child.”
She comes from a family of 3. Growing up, she spoke of the love and affection her family showered on her and also instilled cultural and religious conditioning. She excelled in her education and went ahead to pursue her professional life.
Things were going all well, and then her parents decided to get her married which she was not initially open towards but did it for their happiness as she expressed that she had great regard for them and the effort they put in raising her.
Our lives are split into multiple facets as we meet new people in each of these facets. Some choose to stay while some leave. In the case of Anudhya, she speaks of the incidents that put her through severe overthinking and anxiety.
“Everybody looked at my life as an ideal one. It was only my close ones who knew of my inner struggles. I got into an arranged marriage and it was to somebody within the family that my parents were keen on. Just like any other person I was hoping for a good companion in him.”
Marriage is a significant facet of an individual’s life, as most of us want it to be a fairytale. Unfortunately, that is not the case with everybody and Anudhya described that her marriage started having small issues which would often lead to heated arguments.
It was around this time that Anudhya realised that her organisation had a partnership with YourDOST as their emotional wellness partner. She decided to book counseling session with Ms Sudha Anand after doing her research on the platform.
She actively took sessions with her counselor and worked on herself. Anushya expressed that, her therapist was very friendly and sweet and that she was very comfortable speaking with her.
As things hit her at a young age she speaks of how she did not know how to deal with the building emotions or answer her nosy relatives.
Anudhya mentions how she was not an emotive person and how she could share only limited things with her mother. Serious issues were brewing in her marriage and she was actively seeking support from her circle.
“I started noticing a change in my husbands behaviour. He would only listen to one side of the story and support his family and leave my feelings out. This affected me a lot, a married woman needs immense support from her husband and I was not recieving it.”
She mentioned that in spite of it being an arranged marriage, there were baseless accusations that she was constantly put through and her husband would entirely believe everything his mom said and started sharing about his wife and their personal life with her which put Anushya through severe shock and avoidance.
They got married in 2015 and ended up applying for a divorce in 2018. The fights started worsening every day and started hampering her mental health drastically.
“We stayed together for hardly one year before they filed for divorce. I feel they would have started a search for his re-marriage. It’s very confusing to think about how I even got here.”
She mentioned that the divorce case was on and she was dealing with a lot of negative thoughts like agreeing to an arranged marriage meant that both the family would always support but in her case, the exact opposite had happened to leave her feeling speechless.
The basic fundamental thing for a marriage is understanding between the couples whatever type of marriage it may be.
She also spoke of how his mom had an unhealthy possessiveness that created so many issues between the two of them.
“I remember days how we didn’t get to even go out alone, as his mother and grandmother came wherever we went. We had no privacy. I think they had their son or grandson married becuase of societal expectations.”
Anudhya spoke of all her worries to her counselor and it made her feel at ease.
Witnessing difficult emotions at a young age can leave people disoriented; it takes time and patience to rebuild themselves.
Interestingly Anudhya’s counselor assisted her in identifying her root cause with verbal guidance.
“Ms Sudha was a learned person, and she was extremely experienced. It enabled me to relate so much with her.”
Anudhya narrated how every time she looked at her counselor she would feel better. The resources her counselor shared aided her in staying rational and understand why the problem even happened in the first place.
“She guided me by keeping a positive affirmation statement that I relate with the most and made me feel very secure about my family and mariages issues I face. Through her solution-oriented approach I was able to slowly start the good things in my life.”
Our perspectives towards life change when we surround ourselves with people who trust us and can be trusted. Anudhya explained how he OCD has drastically reduced and she is living in the moment and enjoying the little things around her. Her time management skills have improved and have pushed her to feel good about herself.
“I would like to thank Sudha, you were that person I was looking for in the years of my struggle. You were that one person who could understand me and help me feel better. I am glad we did that together.”
Anudhya expressed that even when she was sceptical at times, her counselor helped her through the journey and was very patient.
She rated herself a 5 on 5 in terms of feeling better, and we are super proud of her progress as all it takes is a leap of faith and courage.
Anudhya’s Warrior Tips:
1.“If you do not ask for help, there would be no magic.”
2.“Have hope that your issues will get solved when you ask for help.”
