Introversion makes it difficult for someone to let their own feelings and emotions out was not an easy task for Ajay. Born and brought up in Telangana, Ajay is a 20-year-old B.Tech. student who is a true mental health warrior. Ajay has been going through a bit of family turmoil from an early age, but the lockdown made it worse.
As a part of precautionary measures, Ajay was asked to shift to his hometown during the lockdown by his institute. Ajay was finding it very hard to stay away from college and in-person lectures and so when the online classes started to commence, it was getting very difficult for him to cope up with the new changes. Days after days, Ajay started noticing a difference in approach by her mother.
“My mother has an old mindset. She always behaves rudely with me and doesn’t really care about what I feel or what I had to say. I always used to carry the weight on my heart of such guilt.”
Ajay was finding it very difficult to surround himself with negativity and taunts from his mother. Ajay was unable to understand the reason behind her mother’s rude behaviour and so he thought, it must have something to do with the traditional mindset. Being an introvert, Ajay never felt like confronting her, and he could not even discuss the same with his friends or other family members.
“I started feeling like a slave. I used to get very angry with everything that she said, but I couldn’t let it out. I started diverting myself by binging on tv shows but that didn’t help me entirely positively.”
With ongoing chaos and frustration, Ajay began to divert himself from thinking about his mother’s opinions. He soon started binge-watching tv shows and movies in order to indulge himself in something which doesn’t concern him rather than feeling blue about the persisting situation. Soon, Ajay felt like he is losing knowledge and wasting away his time by dwelling on negativity. Ajay’s institute has a partnership with YourDOST where he learnt about the counseling services and he decided to reach out to an expert for help.
“How can I reveal all my secrets to a stranger”, Ajay thought to himself. But, he was firm to seek help and get better and so without waiting any more, he reached out to YourDOST counselor Ishita Attri. Ajay could not open up to Ishita fully from the first session itself. It took him about 3 to 4 sessions to get fully comfortable with her and discuss his concerns. Ajay was in awe of Ishita’s listening skills. After many months, Ajay encountered someone with a calm and patient nature and he was glad to take up sessions with her.
“Ishita is an excellent speaker as well. She advised me to feel patient and act in a calm way. She suggested I do yoga to control my anger issues.”
With the help of Ishita’s guidance, Ajay realised that him getting frustrated over his mother’s opinion shouldn’t interfere with his personal work. He understood that mere words spoken in anger should not affect his confidence levels. Ajay slowly started interacting with his mother and took the first step towards resolving their crosstalks. Though Ajay still faces some issues with his brother, his relationship with his mother has improved drastically.
“I consider Ishita as a very good friend of mine. I look forward to her sessions regularly and she showed me very helpful and practical tips too.”
Ajay calls his counseling journey an experience of time-travel, where despite seeking guidance for the past four months, to him, it just felt like a matter of few days! Ajay often used to complain about how he feels shy and acts reserved in front of his friends, despite loving them with all his heart. However, after counseling sessions, Ajay feels more at peace and tries to communicate with his peers and friends more openly. For Ajay, the best part about his counseling journey was to be able to make himself a part of the YourDOST community!
Ajay gave himself a 3.5 out of 5 stars in terms of getting better, but, from all of us at YourDOST –
Ajay, despite being only 20 years old, you have come a long way to prioritise your mental health and be the confident person that you are today!
Ajay’s Warrior Tips:
1. Feeling bad about yourself can make your heart very heavy. So, it’s better to share their feelings and thoughts with close ones.
2. For better solutions, one should reach out to a counselor too. Their guidance will surely help you.
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