An Open Letter To Parents From A Daughter In Her 20s

4 minutes

Dear Mom & Dad,

It’s me, your daughter.

I love you both, and that’s something I can never hide. I’m glad to be your daughter. I must have been blessed to have parents like you, who let me live despite being a daughter.

I know several girls are still being killed; their crime being – they are girls. I’m not among them and I can only be thankful to you both.

I know that bringing me up has been anything but easy for you both. There has always been somebody in the family reminding you that I am your daughter (as if you would forget!) who has to get married. I am thankful to you both that none of their reminders affected you until now. I am in my 20s, so what has changed now? I can see the worry you think you don’t express. I have listened to those secret talks you have when you think I’m not around.

You both have always been more worried about me than Bhai. I have had more rules to follow and still do. My friends have had to give a thorough test before you both approved of them. I didn’t like it but I thought you were protecting me. But now such protection curtails me from my individuality. You both have taught me well. I have been educated unlike so many girls from the village of your childhood. Why then can’t you believe in me?

You taught me to raise my voice against the wrong. Now when I question you why, why do we end up in a fight? Why can’t I cry in front of Dad when I get menstrual cramps? Why can’t I discuss about the boy friends I have had? Why has my marriage become a reason of your worry – hadn’t you told me marriage is a new phase of happiness?

You know I love to travel, but I can’t go around the world until I have a husband. What if he doesn’t like to travel? Love marriage has a stigma in our society and you believe this society more than me. You cannot trust my friends even those from childhood, how then will I trust a stranger of your choice? I am not ready to marry now. My age doesn’t decide my date of marriage, I wish you could understand this.

I am privileged to have you as my parents but now let’s talk about love, boyfriends, drinking and sex.

I need to feel true freedom at home which has been caved in the name of protection till now. Don’t stop me even if I were to fall because I’ll learn to get up and walk. I’m in my 20s. At least now believe that I can differentiate between wrong and right. It’s time that you both begin to trust my choice.

I know I have been the reason for your worry. Someday, I hope I will be the reason for your pride. You both have been my first teachers and I respect you the most. I will owe you both for everything you have done for me. But don’t make this look like a burden and let me free. I want us to be a family who is like friends. I have grown up to be a woman with an understanding of her own, I hope this doesn’t make me the bad one anymore. I want you both to know that your daughter is strong and independent.

Your Loving,


Let your daughters breath, let them have what they equally deserve – Freedom! You can get Parenting Advice from the experts at YourDOST.

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