Why Wives Are Stressed Most of The Time

5 minutes

People generally say women are hard to love, (and by people, I mostly mean MEN!). Men often say (read: Complain) that women are complicated and make everything complex. They do things, say things, work out things, but ALAS! Things remain the same.

As time passes by like a free bird, marital problems become magnified when the partners take their personal stresses out on each other. The resulting problems can get so complicated that they become very difficult to unravel.


Your spouse is a handy scapegoat for stress-related problems that really have nothing to do with him or her. Still, your partner is often the most available (and least risky) target. It’s only a matter of time until your spouse will retaliate by directing his or her stress-related anger and frustration right back at you.

Well, fear not.

Here we have compiled a list of signs which will help you identify and reduce the stressors.

  1. The Judgement

A Wife is expected to cook food, keep the house clean, finish all her responsibilities personally and professionally to the tee and oh Yes! Look presentable. And if somewhere she is left behind even by 1%, people begin to wonder if she is alright. “Maybe she is under the influence of medicines or alcohol” “Look, how irresponsible she is” “She doesn’t have time for family and her responsibilities” and it continues..

Whereas if it’s a reversal of roles, the man is showered with compliments and support. “That’s a good job. You are doing good. Now a days husbands don’t do so much. Your wife is lucky.”

See what I am trying to point out?

  1. Women are often more intuitive than men

At any given point of time, a woman’s brain focuses on a 100 things at a time. It is like a ticking clock which works on many time zones together. She would be thinking about tonight’s dinner, your child’s homework, your clothes for tomorrow, her project deadline, her mother-in-law’s diet, her best friend’s birthday surprise, etc, all at the same time. Which is also one of the reasons why a man often wonders why is his lady giving 8 different answers to a simple question he had asked.

So the bottom line is your wife is more sensitive, perceptive and intuitive to the environment around her. She is RIGHT! Most of the time, listen to her. And when things don’t go as per the plan, you and your wife eventually are stressed.

  1. Women need more sleep than men

With the ongoing tornado in their minds, women often are restless and yet calm. Women are most often the ones who are up with the kids in the middle of the night. Or be it a nagging mother-in-law. Maybe it’s the office pressure. Or just maybe because she is the wife and daughter-in-law and hence she needs to sleep late and wake up early. So, your wife has a sleep deficit, which means she’s more easily stressed out. If you want a less stressed wife, get up with the kids or maybe her. Or just maybe help her out whichever way you are comfortable with.

  1. Women know balance matters

Women know how important the balance between her profession and personal life is. And hence, she strives to achieve the same. She ensures her house is squeaky clean, her chores are finished on time, her boss gets the project files on time, her best friend has the best day of her life. She knows the importance of impressions. She knows the expressions and eye rolls.

In society, there is a baseline expectation that your home does not look dirty and messy when you entertain guests. Keeping a fairly normal looking home is a proxy variable for ‘understands how society works.’

So, if your wife wants her house to be clean before having people over, or just as a default in case people come over, this is basically saying, ‘I want others to view our family as a reasonable group of humans who fit into society and with whom it may be plausible to have a friendship, not as a visiting band of Martians with no working knowledge of this planet and its social mores.’

So, there you have it. A detailed analysis of why your wife is always stressed. So, the next time your wife is upset about something, show sympathy, instead of judging. She is maintaining a delicate balance, and it is only understandable that the scales tip at times.

If you are a stressed wife and need someone to talk to, or you need advice on how to talk to your stressed out wife, approach YourDOST experts for personalized guidance and support!

Shailaja Shyamsukha

Shailaja is a special friend at YourDOST. She is a practicing psychologist with 2 years of experience. She has studied psychology from GITAM UNIVERSITY. She currently lives in Mumbai.