Trigger Warning: Mention of Abuse
“Sometimes the hardest part isn’t letting go, but rather learning to start again.” – Nicole Sobon.
Meet Deepa, a 30-year-old employee at Darwinbox Digital and a determined woman who can walk past those hardest parts of life with her chin up!
She was born and raised in Kerala in a joint family. She explains that she spent all her childhood with the maternal side of her family. Since Deepa’s father mostly stayed abroad for work, she was closest to her grandmother and uncle.
As she grew up seeing dysfunctional marriages, including her parents’, Deepa adds that she had always prayed for a marriage filled with love and peace.
Deepa has moved to a different state for her career. She stayed in Pune for her education and lived in Bangalore and Hyderabad after she got her job before moving back to her home in Kerala, where she started working remotely. Her mom and grandma currently live with her, too, while her brother moved to the United Kingdom.
Although Deepa paints her life like the sketches on her canvas, being cautious with each stroke but also throwing in splendid colours to make it vibrant. However, in 2022 where the canvas turned into a vast shadow of darkness. She found herself in an abusive marriage, which was hurting her badly.
“I endured emotional abuse from my ex-partner. While I understood it was slowly turning to physical abuse too, I couldn’t take it anymore, and after three to four months into the relationship, I decided to part ways, even though it was hard.”
Deepa elaborates that even after she separated and moved out, she felt the world had become noisy, and the road to her future seemed scary. The burden of carrying her past and fearing the future started inducing anxiety attacks in her.
She recollects how difficult each day became, and she felt confused all the time. Deepa knew about her company’s partnership with YourDOST to provide employees with well-being services. She decided to reach out to the experts and seek help.
During her first session, Deepa connected with Ms Anita Elisa and found her to be empathetic and understanding throughout their conversation. Deepa discussed with the counselor about how she can approach her situation and she also considered bringing her ex-partner into a couple session.
“At that phase, my mind was working in various ways. The person I thought was right for me and with whom I wanted to start a family with was abusive, and I didn’t know if I should bear with it or stand up for myself.”
Deepa elaborates that it was a bad phase for her, and she couldn’t wrap her mind around why it was happening. She adds that her ex-partner wasn’t even ready to discuss their issues or try therapy.
Understanding the dire situation Deepa was in, the counselor put forward the suggestions that gently directed her towards finding her way out of this by herself. Deepa explains that at first Ms Anita made her declutter her mind, so that she can untie the knots in her mind and prioritise making the right decisions.
The counselor also taught Deepa how to handle a stressful situation with her partner without getting triggered by the other person’s arguments. Deepa adds that she learned to be mature and handle things in a fruitful manner.
Eventually, Deepa made the call to file for divorce, and her family also stood by her in the brave decision she made. Despite how difficult the situation was, she made efforts to stay strong for herself, walked the darkness and reached her canvas of light with confidence.
“I wouldn’t say everything is better after my divorce. Some days are absolute delight, some days I need to pick the pieces a little harder, but I learned to deal with those ups and downs, thanks to Ms Anita.”
As she expresses her heartfelt gratitude for her counselor, she rates herself 3 out of 5 and makes a consistent effort to improve and keep herself throughout the fluctuating phases of her life.
We are proud of Deepa for being an astonishing, empowered woman who stood for herself. We are happy to be a small part of her magnificent journey.
Deepa’s Warrior Tips:
1.“When there’s a low point in life, just believe – this too shall pass.”
2.“Learn to adapt to change and remove all the clutter to function better.”
Are you someone who has gone through a difficult phase and emerged stronger and better, with some professional help? Share your story with us to encourage thousands of others who might be struggling. Click here to submit your story.
