Sri is a 21-year-old law student at Bennett University. She is currently in her fourth year of BBA LLB.
Born and brought up in Hyderabad, Sri comes from a family of women, including herself, her elder sister, and her mom, who is a microbiologist. She explains that recollection of her childhood always brings her pain as she lost her father at the age of six.
“I don’t remember the happy days from my childhood as only the traumatic events jump out every time I try to recollect. It’s all hazy, but one thing for sure is that I loved both my parents as a kid.”
Sri’s family moved in with her grandparents after her dad passed away and shifted to being on their own after a few years. Despite the things they went through, Sri explains that her mom always wanted the best for them. Her mom also had the emotional support of her maternal uncle, and his children used to hang out with Sri and her sister all the time as one happy family.
“No matter where we are in life, my sister and cousins and I always find a way to go on a trip to spend quality time for at least ten days a year.”
However, she adds that despite her mom’s constant efforts to help Sri actively express how she feels about life, it hasn’t been easy for her to be vulnerable. Apart from Sri’s interest in art forms such as painting, Bharatanatyam, and Carnatic music, her mom made Sri join dance classes at 7 to help her be more expressive.
She describes her childhood personality as being an ‘artistic kid’. She eventually learned to use art as a coping mechanism to express and relieve stress.
Once her elder sister moved to the United Kingdom, Sri moved to Noida to pursue her undergraduate studies. Her mom also moved to Noida to be with Sri. She started going to college with high aspirations and ambitions. As the days went by, Sri encountered certain challenges while trying to find her place in the new environment.
As someone from one of the South Indian states, she struggled to fit in the new city and didn’t have great dynamics in finding friends. Sri also started having trouble sleeping. Gradually, the insomnia turned into nightmares with glimpses from her childhood trauma and started triggering negative emotions in Sri.
“I remember waking up crying hysterically and immediately rushing down from my apartment to take a brisk walk as I didn’t want to be within four walls at that moment. I couldn’t bother my sister either, as she was already struggling to live in a foreign country with no one to support her.”
Sri explains that feeling helpless and confused, she realised she needed professional help and decided to seek therapy. She recollects a session on ‘the impact of academics on the student’s mental health, and how it shapes their personality’.
“An integrated law degree takes up half a decade of a person’s life, so keeping one’s emotions in check becomes vital. That’s why our college has a subscription to YourDOST as part of their student well-being plan.”
Sri thought it was a good initiative, and since she was actively looking for help, she signed up for face-to-face offline counseling from the YourDOST platform. She started taking sessions with Ms Sanjana Guha Roy. Sri adds that as she went in for the first session, she had reservations, thinking it might not work because she had problems expressing her emotions.
“The popular opinion is therapy doesn’t work if you don’t know how to express, but thank god for my counselor Ms Sanjana, that wasn’t the case.”
Sri recollects Ms Sanjana giving her space and not pounding her with rigorous questioning. She adds that she was provided with a calm environment to let her feel what she was feeling and talk slowly. Sri says it was new to her as she was not used to people sitting and listening to her patiently. Once she felt comfortable, Sri began venting her thoughts, and she remembers crying hard during that first session.
She explains that it felt like a huge weight had been lifted off her chest, and she was encouraged to continue the sessions regularly every week. She opened up to the therapist about how she doesn’t remember parts of her childhood and how it was affecting her brain and sleep cycle.
Understanding her issues, the therapist encouraged Sri to talk about the part of her childhood that she remembered and what she saw in her dreams. Since the conversation would be uncomfortable and overwhelming for Sri to process, she gave her ample time to recollect slowly.
Instead of drawing conclusions from the memories, Sri explains that Ms Sanjana asked her a few questions to help her reach that conclusion on her own. To help Sri with her issue of expressing emotion, the therapist made her draw the things that came to her mind every time she felt an emotion.
As the sessions proceeded, Sri saw herself improving, and the therapist also employed various techniques to help her understand the role her subconscious thoughts and memories play in her life.
When offline sessions weren’t possible, Sri also tried video call sessions on the platform and found them helpful, as she could access them anywhere in her comfort zone. She has continued her sessions with another therapist, Mr Lijith Lohidhakshan, for over two years.
Following techniques from both therapists, Sri started feeling relieved and finally found a way to express her emotions. Even though she has dreams that could trigger her, Sri explains that she understands how to deal with them better.
“Learning how to express and process emotion is a huge deal for me, and therapy has been a complete game changer in my life. I’m thankful to Ms Sanjana and Mr Lijith for that.”
Sri adds that from feeling uncomfortable talking to someone; she has become someone who suggests people open up in therapy. Seeing that as an improvement, she rates herself 3.5 out of 5, and we are happy to see her keep going forward.
Sri’s Warrior Tips:
1.“It’s essential to notice your patterns and divert yourself from the hose by changing the flow.”
2.“Don’t ignore the alarm when something tells you you need help; recognise and act on it.”
3.“Therapy is a slow and continuous process, and you have to trust the process to succeed.”
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