Simran is a 27-year-old vibrant corporate employee residing in the garden city of Bangalore. She used to work in the Marketing team at Upgrad. She is originally from Kota, an industrial town on the bank of the Chambal River in Rajasthan.
Simran spent most of her childhood and teenage years in Rajasthan, about which she speaks fondly. She was raised in a joint family dynamic with twelve kids.
“I lived in an interconnected house of two. Four of our families live together in it on different floors. We are too close-knit that we do not differentiate between siblings and cousins, parents and uncles.”
Simran adds that all seven female kids were exceptionally close, and she loves each of her sisters. She explained that after finishing school, each sister and brother moved out and went on to college and careers.
“As we grew, we moved out, and I went to Bombay for my graduation, then to Delhi to do my postgraduate studies, and then to Bangalore for my job. Despite that, I still hold my childhood memories very close to my heart, as those were the golden days of my life.”
Diving into her childhood memories, Simran describes being a hyper and fidgety kid in school with a lot of energy. She adds that those traits are still a part of her.
“I’m a little chirpy and hyperactive. As kids, my sisters would tell me if I sat still for at least 10 minutes, they would get me a chocolate, but that wouldn’t happen because I could never.”
She explained that she was also very hardworking and that it would frustrate her if she didn’t see results. She says that this part of her stems from her father’s personality. Apart from these, Simran has an extensive interest in fashion, painting, and calligraphy. She adds she loves incorporating many colours into her style and life.
She spent her years with a secure upbringing, quality education, and multiple treasured people. Still, Simran encountered a difficult period when she started having issues in her romantic relationship.
“I have been in much longer relationships before, but this person was my close friend, and we started seeing each other. When we fought, he just broke up with me. It was shocking and excruciating.”
Simran explained that even though she had told her family about it, she couldn’t share the details and felt she needed external help. As she already knew about Upgrad’s partnership with YourDOST, she decided to seek therapy with the experts on the platform.
“I have taken therapy before that, but still, I was sceptical as I wasn’t sure how anybody could help in this scenario. Beyond my doubts, I went for the sessions, which became an outstanding experience.”
She elaborates that the first few times, she took sessions in the middle of the night as she wasn’t sleeping well thinking about her situation. Eventually, she found the counselor, Ms Nidhi Nahata, helpful.
Simran felt the counselor was calm, had much in common with her, and was young enough to match her pulse. She described that Ms Nidhi could relate to her and felt she was sharing her issues with a friend rather than a stranger.
Simran started working on her relationship issues with therapy. She explains that she used to be confident in handling her life, but her problems with this relationship challenged her.
“When I started seeing this friend, he wanted an official relationship, but I wasn’t ready. After a year of dating, I got emotionally dependent on him ultimately. When we had a huge fight, he discredited our bond and blocked me everywhere.”
Simran explains that more than a romantic relationship, it made her feel like she lost a friend, and even when they started talking again, it didn’t feel the same for her. She says that Ms Nidhi directed her on how to heal in this situation, and Simran feels she sought help at the right time.
“Even though when my friend and I started speaking again, I constantly felt heavy on my chest, like a stone was blocking my airways. This entire experience felt new to me.”
Simran explains that she was grieving the loss of something she valued a lot, and it felt brutal. She says that she found it hard to describe the intensity of her emotion, but her counselor understood her well and helped Simran using various techniques.
“I started being insecure about myself, which wasn’t normal. When I expressed it to Ms Nidhi, she gave me a journaling activity where I would down every statement that made me feel insecure or diminish my confidence level.”
The counselor also gave Simran a cognitive distortion checklist to identify her emotional patterns and sent her videos for meditation to reduce her anxiety gradually and help her sleep better. Being a hyperactive person, Simran adds that she never thought she would find help in meditation, but surprisingly, she continued the habit along with journaling even after the sessions ended.
She says that initially, her acquaintances told her that all they do in therapy is probably listen, which won’t solve her problem. Simran adds that she found therapy to be much more.
“My issues with my friend continued to exist even after therapy, but how I was responding to it changed a lot after following the guidance of my counselor. It had a calming effect on me.”
Simran elaborates that it was a journey she was supposed to take, and she is happy that she could find Ms Nidhi to walk her through that process. She also adds that it was righteous of the counselors on the platform to be available late at night, even when we can’t reach out to our loved ones for help.
As Simran moves on to her subsequent phases of life, constantly improving herself, she gives herself a 3 out of 5. We are glad Simran got where she is today and hope to see her completely healed in the future, as she desires.
Simran’s Warrior tips:
1.“We all face tough times. Instead of being hard on yourself, take one day at a time and give yourself time to heal.”
2.“Actively speaking to someone about your issues helps you feel better.”
3.“Life is too short to dwell on and worry about anything for longer; seek therapy, move on, and take life as it comes. ”
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