Childhood is a time that shapes a person’s personality and even their thoughts. However, some experiences that we have as a child might remain ingrained in our minds forever. Here’s a story of how our protagonist challenged these thoughts with therapy.
Rupabrata is a 29-year-old young adult who works as an Instructional Designer at SPI Technology. He hails from Malda, a city in the middle of West Bengal. He is a biker at heart and never misses out on an opportunity to go on trips to remote places on his beloved motorcycle. He hums a tune whenever he feels extra happy.
Rupabrata is the youngest in the family, and most of his growing years as a child had experiences relating to his parents, especially his mother, and his close bond with his maternal grandfather.
“I grew up in a family where emotional availability was rarely available from my father’s side but often found in my mother’s comforting presence.”
Rupabrata’s maternal grandfather was his role model, and he helped him learn the crucial lessons of life and also helped him in academics. Rupabrata learned to question the world, think logically, and develop a structured way of looking at things through him. This relationship defined his early years, shaping the thoughtful and reflective person he is today.
He eventually started staying and working in Kolkata after his education in Barhampur and Kolkata. However, the bustling city life became challenging for him in ways he had not imagined.
“Despite having moved there for opportunities, the city felt isolating. I had no close family or friends around, and gradually, I pinned all the emotional support I needed on my girlfriend.”
As often is the case, however, such expectations started to break into their relationship.
“I began placing all my emotional weight on her and could not help it when I felt angry because things weren’t going as expected.”
That realisation came as a shock to Rupabrata. In his head, the root cause for these frustrations was his job, and in no time, his anger spiralled into a dislike for his work, a vicious cycle of dissatisfaction. That is when he decided to seek help.
Fortunately for him, his workplace had partnered with YourDOST, serving as their official mental health partner. This tie-up introduced him to his counsellor, Ananya Purkayastha.
“She was a good listener; she not only listened to me but was observant and gave me advice according to my problems.”
This tailored approach had been what Rupabrata was searching for all along. Through therapy, he was gradually unknotting his emotional outbursts, his feelings of neglect, and the urge to victimise himself.
One of the most significant breakthroughs in his therapy sessions was that he realised he was carrying unresolved anger and bitterness from his childhood.
While his father was able to give his family a comfortable life, he had never been present for his son. In Rupabrata, this built a vacuum.He felt uncared for and started going away from his family. However reaching adulthood in search of warmth and closeness he started to expect a lot from others, like his friends, girlfriend, and even colleagues. When these expectations were not met, it was like rejection, and his disappointment would accumulate and erupt eventually.
“I always felt like nobody cared for me. It wasn’t even about what they were doing but how I interpreted it. I was making myself the victim.”
Ananya helped him see that his thoughts weren’t realities. One such exercise they did was to stop and reflect on whether his preconceived thoughts were correct. The shift in perspective brought a sense of control over situations that always made him feel helpless.
Regular therapy sessions slowly brought about changes in Rupabrata’s life. The relationships at home, either with his parents or with his girlfriend, gradually improved. Anger that would well up anytime, over the slightest provocation, steadily reduced, though there was some regression, notably after an accident had confined him to his room for some time. But even during those difficult times, therapy remained a lifeline.
“After the therapy, I felt a lot of positive changes. For some time, the anger problems went away, and I could mingle better with people around. I continue with the therapy, and it has been going on pretty well.”
Rupabrata is still on a journey to discover himself, but his story only reminds us that healing is possible. He is grateful to Ananya, whose patience and dedication helped him discover his true self.
“Ananya is the reason why I know the onset of my issues, which helped me try to solve them from the roots. She is an amazing listener who patiently heard me and gave me the support I always needed. She inspires me to be better, and I can’t thank her enough.”
Rupabrata rates himself as 3 out of 5 in terms of feeling better and envisions improvement as being his better self. His story proves that with patience, self-compassion, and the proper support, we can overcome even the most deeply rooted struggles.
We at YourDOST are proud of his journey and wish him the best of luck!
Rupabrata’s Warrior Tips:
1.“The process of healing isn’t linear, nor is it immediate. All good things take time.”
2.“We should not be discouraged if the first therapist or technique doesn’t resonate, and we should keep looking for the best person for us.”
3.“It’s all about finding the right person for you. Therapy works differently for everyone, and you need to find someone who can truly listen and understand you.”
Are you someone who has gone through a difficult phase and emerged stronger and better, with some professional help? Share your story with us to encourage thousands of others who might be struggling. Click here to submit your story.
