“When Someone Shows You Who They Are, Believe Them”- Maya Angelou
There would be situations in life where we tend to hold on to things that were long dead and provide no benefit to us just because we are afraid to get out of our comfort zones. However, with the right guidance and vision, you’ll learn to let go of things when they start feeling heavy and invaluable.
Meet Dhananjai, a 29-year-old visual designer from Lucknow who currently works for a bioscience company in Gurgaon. He pursued a Master’s in Photography and design from the prestigious NID Ahmedabad.
Dhananjai comes from a loving family and has a supportive circle of friends. He shares that he used to be very close to his mom and nuclear family but feels he naturally individuates from them.
While their relationship remains cordial and free from negative emotions, he acknowledges that his sense of belonging has changed. He views this as a natural progression in life, like the shifting sands in an hourglass.
“I love learning new things in life. Anything to do with visuals excites me, be it photography, movies, or art. I’m also fond of creative writers and music, and though I’m not much of a reader, I seek out those gems of thoughts that excite me. Just like finding an unexpected B-side track from a favourite band, these discoveries bring joy.”
Dhananjai first heard about YourDOST from his alma mater, which partners with the organization to promote the mental well-being of its students. He sought therapy and found guidance through two significant counsellors, Ms Nikita Aggarwal and Ms Sheetal Rajput.
“With Nikita, I sensed she was trying to stay objective. She helped me step outside my problems and see them in a new light. It made me realize that my issues might not be as overwhelming as I thought.”
However, it was his experience with Sheetal that truly transformed his journey. Sheetal’s approach was more of a professional friendship. She offered relatable examples and broke them down into smaller, understandable pieces. This approach was instrumental when Dhananjai was dealing with a toxic and abusive relationship involving both physical and emotional violence.
“With Sheetal, I felt supported without judgment. She never shamed me for wanting to go back to my abusive partner. She was gentle and understanding, helping me channel my feelings and decisions like guiding me through a maze of emotions.”
Dhananjai blames the deterioration of his relationship as ignoring the red flags and his gut instincts. Nikita’s initial guidance had taught him to think about what is best for himself when making decisions. This was a lesson he unfortunately disregarded when it came to love.
“I kept assuring myself that love is complicated and hard, ignoring my thoughts and needs. Pleasing my partner became my priority, and I neglected myself entirely.”
Through Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Nikita provided Dhananjai with tools to help him analyze and understand his thoughts and reactions. Though he admits he wasn’t diligent with the exercises, they laid a foundation for his healing.
“I have broken up with my ex for about seven to eight months now and it was a brutal breakup. Now, as I’m back in the dating pool, I’m not rushing into things. I’m more vocal about my feelings and what I want. It’s like learning to dance again after tripping over the same steps.”
Dhananjai expresses deep gratitude to his counsellors, especially Sheetal, for providing an unbiased ear and a safe space to share his thoughts without feeling judged or shamed.
“She was my outlet when my friends and family couldn’t be. Being gay added another layer of complexity to sharing my relationship problems, but Sheetal’s non-judgmental approach made all the difference.”
Rating his current state of mind, Dhananjai gives himself a 4 out of 5, acknowledging his progress and the accountability he now holds for his actions.
We at YourDOST are confident that Dhananjai is on the path to reaching his full potential, and we wish him all the best in the future!
Dhananjai’s Warrior Tips:
1.“Mental health is as much about finding the reasons as it is about accountability. Just because you can explain some behaviour doesn’t mean it’s acceptable.”
2.“Believe in yourself and stay engaged by learning or doing something new.”
3.“Find an outlet to talk about your issues without filters. It’s important to have someone who listens without judgment.”
Are you someone who has gone through a difficult phase and emerged stronger and better, with some professional help? Share your story with us to encourage thousands of others who might be struggling. Click here to submit your story.
