Marudev, 22-year-old is learning B.Des from a reputed college, National Institute of Design Assam. He is in the final lap of his college life. With a pencil in his hand and passion in his heart, he brings his art to life. Cooking becomes a leisurely escape from the normal for him.
Marudev’s childhood was marked by a strong connection with his grandparents who became the guiding light after the untimely loss of his father. Living with grandparents shaped his formative years. He is fortunate to have his grandparents by his side.
“My grandfather is strict as a colonel, but he’s truly amazing. He expresses his affection for me and truly cares for me.”
Reflecting on his childhood memories, as he looks back at those unforgettable moments seems like flickering fragments, slipping away from his grasp.
Ever since his childhood, he was the shy one, keeping his thoughts and feelings tightly locked within himself. He did not speak up much and suppressed his feelings in silence. Marudev had built a fortress around him and was unwilling to venture beyond its protective walls. The guards of his fortress stood firm, refusing to let him reveal his true emotions. He realised soon that by keeping his feelings hidden, those around him remained unaware of his struggles, leading to a potential misunderstanding and negative consequences.
Shyness took its toll on Marudev, leading to a lack of confidence and an excessive amount of overthinking. However, as he embarked on his college journey, he found himself great friends among the unknowns and gradually found his place. With limited interactions, he found solace in the company of books. It was through his reading practice did he stumble upon insightful books that shed light on the working of his mind.
“At one point I could not hold onto a conversation. I did not know how to express how I felt.”
Marudev was constantly tormented by self-consciousness, his mind would play tricks on him and convince him that he was always to blame for everything that happened. The notion of being at fault always was deeply engraved in his head, hindering his perception of thoughts.
“For the past 7-8 years, I have been dealing with these challenges, but I have learned that things have a way of falling into place at the right time. It’s a matter of being patient.”
Marudev feels blessed to have come across YourDOST, a platform dedicated to nurturing mental well-being and providing a space to talk about their struggle. He heard about YourDOST, through his college’s subscription with the organisation. Since then, he has never looked back and is set on a journey of his own.
During the first few sessions, he connected with Mr Omprakash who would become his guiding light in this journey. Marudev found him to be a great listener and he never gave any advice but rather made him ponder upon the solution. He encouraged him to delve deeper into self-reflection and find solutions to his problems. It was a new beginning for him with his counselor, discovering his path to recovery.
Omprakash suggested some techniques for him to follow. In a situation where Marudev struggled to speak or express, he suggested taking a pause and then trying. This practice boosted his morale and reduced his anxiety to a certain level.
“Words cannot express the gratitude I feel towards Omprakash bhaiya. I will always be thankful to Omprakash, he is like a brother to me. He guided me to handle my situation and armed me with adequate skills to do so.”
As therapy progressed, Marudev could sense the changes within himself. He had mastered the art of expressing his thoughts and feelings without fear of judgement. His anxiety levels had come down a notch. With each passing session, his confidence grew, and discovered the strength to communicate better with his friends and family.
“I’m now able to speak my mind and assert myself. The fear of being wrong no longer troubles me. I have learned to embrace my voice and express myself openly.”
Marudev rates himself a solid 3 out of 5 in terms of getting better. He is optimistic to bounce back with a full house 5 one day. He strives to learn new things and lead a path toward a brighter future.
Marudev’s Warrior Tips:
1.”Take some time to understand and express your feelings. Don’t keep them bottled up inside.”
2.“Prioritise your mental well-being and engage in practices like meditation and yoga to achieve inner peace.”
3.”When in doubt, write that down, or maybe talk to your closest friend or seek help from the experts. It’s very important to let things out.”
