Akanksha’s Approach Towards Accepting Newness One Day At A Time in a New Country.

6 minutes

Accepting newness in our daily lives can taste like Bhalla Papdi chaat, a little of everything is what brings the highlight to this dish. It is similar to the story of Akanksha who has been a steadfast dreamer with her choices and decisions and this is her empowering story of how she handled the change in the most graceful manner possible.

Akanksha is from Delhi, the ever-brimming capital city with historical monuments, UNESCO World Heritage sites, cafes, bars, a lit nightlife and delicious street food. 

The narrow lanes of Old Delhi, soak in the old-world charm of Qutub Minar and the never-ending food trail in the scanty lanes of Chandni Chowk is beautiful in its way.

Akanksha is the elder daughter and comes from a humble family of five. Being the eldest comes with responsibilities and expectations and it was no different in Akanksha’s case. 

She has two younger siblings, and there has always been a hierarchy in the relationship they share. 

Speaking of her childhood, she articulates that it took her time to relate to her responsibilities of being the prototype to her siblings and had to constantly change her way of speaking, and clothing. 

“We did not talk much except for household work. There was always a divide because of the age, and he is 21 now and we have started talking slowly and I think that is progress from what we used to be.” 

Akanksha’s hobbies include listening to music, singing, and exploring. She plays the guitar, ukelele and bass. She spent most of her time reading than going out. 

She was mostly raised by her grandparents and has a great memory that she explained. 

It is intriguing to learn about the kind of dynamics we build with our grandparents as it leaves us with a bag full of nostalgia and learning. 

“Some of my best memories with my grandparents are going for long walks with them in the morning.” 

Akanksha explains about the relationship she shared with her siblings is like that of a mother more than a sister. 

“I don’t like how I had to grow up early and had to mostly mother him and I did not enjoy doing that. I had to focus on my academics and did not have a chance to do much, but it all started changing after I finished high school. I read a lot. “

Akanksha has always had her share of exploration when it comes to understanding the kind of bond she shares with her family. Her dad is a man of fewer words and prefers his own company and her mother on the other hand is an expressive person. 

Akanksha is not new to therapy as she has been in therapy since she was 14. 

“My mom is from the medical line and I had difficulty making connections she felt speaking to experts would help me with my interpersonal communications.” 

Akanksha goes on to elucidate how the discussions of mental health were still a myth to most of them in her house. 

“I would often have to tell them I have a meeting or a work call in order to sit down for my sessions, so they wouldn’t bug me and ask me why I’m seeking expert’s help.”

“My father is an avoidant, he was emotional when I left for London, and all he said is take care.”

Her intervention with YourDOST happened one day when she read an email from the organisation which was the official mental health partner of her college. 

“I decided to sign up and opted for video consultations which helped me open up more and get that personal connection. My therapist was selfless she even reached out to me when I did not take my sessions as I was busy with my Visa.” 

Akanksha is a dreamer and is now in London pursuing her dream. She expresses the role of her counselor – Ms. Aashana Agarwal on her and felt her presence was a huge support to her life. 

Ms. Aashana has always been by my side from the whole process of getting the visa ready till almost shared the happiness of studying in London with me. 

Akanksha got closer to herself by putting in sufficient energy in doing the techniques suggested by her counselor. 

“She asked me to deconstruct my bigger tasks into smaller ones, practice grounding techniques, write things I want to tell my mom, and how I should distinguish my thoughts from my mom.”

It does become a challenge to become our own individuals as it can get taxing in the process, especially with those who experience feelings of contradicting emotions from their parents, and Akanksha felt the same way. 

However, with time, she was able to manifest her emotions through the techniques suggested to becoming a queen of her own emotions and she is in a better place now. 

In terms of feeling better on a scale of 1 to 5, Akanksha rated herself with a 4.5 and we are equally proud of her innate strength and conviction towards her goals and wish her all success.

Akanksha’s Warrior Tips:
1.”Trust the process it does get better with time if we choose to look beyond the problem.”
2.”All of us have our lowest but we need to hold on and believe in ourselves to also overcome those that cause us these feelings.”

Team YourDOST

YourDOST is an Online Emotional Wellness Coach. Through YourDOST anyone can Sign Up and anonymously seek advice and guidance from Counsellors, Psychologists, Special Friends, Mentors and other experienced individuals.