I am a 37 year old working women. I am married for 10 years. But never had a satisfactory family life. I had back to back problems and failures in my personal as well as professional life for past one year. I came across a guy(34y) in my workplace. At first, he seemed to be much interested in speaking with me. He used to come to my place just for asking silly questions. He would stare at me all the time, we were sitting opposite to each other in office. He used to look deep in my eyes always when he spoke with me. When I started noticing this guys behaviour, it was noticed by other team members too. They were making fun of me indirectly. I was in Cloud nine. My past issues and emotional instability, made me enjoy the attention I got. One day when I was speaking, I felt he came physically very close to me. His facial expressions, his behaviour all made me believe that he had crush on me. I started looking at him all the day. His sight made me forget all the pain and made me happy. So out of emotion, I told him one day that I started liking you. He told the next moment that he don't have any feelings and I am only assuming things. I told him that even my team mates think that. When days passed by, he started avoiding me. He ignored even if I speak. He changed his place. Stopped eye contact. But he would reply if I ping in chat. He kept on telling me that he dont have any feelings for me, but OK to speak with me, but didn't come to speak with me like before, as others are making fun and it may spoil my name. I just shattered. I tried hard to make him speak with me normally like he did before and forget the episode. But he kept on telling reasons. But will reply my chat or WhatsApp anytime. I changed my job. He didn't tell bye to me even on the last day. When I asked in text, he gave some weird reasons. Then he stopped replying my messages. Stopped taking call. It made me mad. One day I called from different number and he picked the call. He told he don't want to communicate with me hereafter and want me to move on. I could not digest these. I know I am a married woman with children, I expressed my crush on him, he too married with children. I didn't want to have an affair. I wanted someone to emotionally support me. I somehow felt him too close and supportive. But he ignored me and tripled my pain. Even now I keep on messaging him, asking sorry, to forget whatever happened and be normal with me. But he never replies me. I told him if it's nuisance for him, Let him block my number. But he did not do that too. I am not able to forget the episode and move on. Feel very low about myself, my behaviour. Shame, pain and guilt drowns me. It's been more than a month. But not even a single day passed without me crying. If he speaks normally I may feel peaceful. But he is so adamant and it makes me feel low. I had a fracture in between and confined to bed. This makes me even worse. I told him about the fracture and he didn't even reply for that. This loneliness and low self image makes me so much depressed. I could not concentrate on anything else. Not finding any way or anyone to help me out. Please tell me practical ways to get over this and move on.
