One of my closest colleagues is having a tough time already due to the office culture, past regrets, subtle bullying. He does have a habit of overthinking and obsessing about what others might think of him. He has anger management issues too and explodes on occasions if not too often.
He has been labelled as the "NICE GUY" due to his apparent nice behavior with his colleagues even with the "Janitors". He clearly disapproves of the NICE GUY tag because he believes this kind of behavior doesn't make a person eligible for appreciation and laurels and therefore should be normalized.
His main concerns are some in our office think of him as fake. He doesn't have much friends even in his personal life. He also believes that his apparent nice behavior comes as surprise to people and makes them think of him as fake.
But that's not all. He has confessed to being really shy and timid around women. He regrets beings so because he agrees that woman are just people like any one else but he believes sub consciously his thoughts are wrong about women. He has never been in a relationship in his 26 years of life but he also claims not being too desperate to get into a relationship. His colleagues and seniors have gotten to know about his dating life and the fact that he uses dating apps and now they always make fun of him. Not only that, there is a lady in the office who kinda feels uncomfortable around him like she would get up and leave (if she was chilling) even if he had arrived just to have a chat with someone else present there.
He entirely blames it upon himself (maybe, rightly so). He claims to be aware of what difficulty women go through in their lives and claims to have empathy not pity/sympathy for them. Not too sure if he's over thinking or under thinking but all these issues which add up to his prolonged mental health issues (Depression, OCD and Extreme anxiety) are affecting his productivity at work. He has lately started appearing grumpy and a bit sarcastic. I wonder what actually goes through his mind? What if he's actually fake? What if he actually deserves to despised? He is someone who 90 out of 100 occasions appears to stay calm even after being instigated and poked but when it comes to the rest occasions, he wouldn't care who he's talking with or where he is (if you know what I mean) Even though he raises his voice, he was never heard using a cuss word till now.
I don't know what the hell is wrong with this guy. I am kinda fed up with this. he requested me to post this question on his behalf since he's afraid of getting his identity revealed. I wonder do I actually know him well.
I would request lady psychologists too for post their opinions about his condition and the solution for him, if possible. I am okay with him coming to me and seeking help every time.
PS: A year ago, I was waiting for him downstairs so that we could go home together. A common female friend came to me and asked who I was waiting for. After replying to her question I got advised by her not to interact with him because he is crazy. Irony is, she would be the person to initiate a conversation with him seek his advises on professional issues and act like she sees him as a potential friend. Strange.
Also, he sleeps around 18 hours a day in weekends, holidays, even on his birthdays, as I am told by him. He is really thin scrawny and falls sick very often (or pretends to be, or I dunno).