I am really sorry for your loss dear.
I know it is tough for you. I can understand how difficult you have been feeling after your beloved wife's death. Yes... it is really unfortunate what has happened to you.
You need to speak and vent out your sorrows with someone it can be your parents, relatives or friends who can understand you better. You can also speak about this with the few experts available here by clicking on the link www.yourdost.com/talkitOut.
You are grieving for your wife's death and grieving is natural and it is painful but what you can think about is your kid. Your kid needs the motherly care and only you can provide it and I'm pretty sure you have heard it from a different source already but that is the fact and you need to build yourself stronger for your child. I know it is easier said that done but to really honor your wife is by living your life to the fullest.
Take help from the professional to help you in your grieving. You are going through the different stages of grieving. You may need some time. Time heals the deepest wound. You can connect with me and let's talk about it if you want, you can search my name in the expert page of this website and leave me a message.