HI PLEASE HELP! SOMEONE HELP ME!
its been 7 months now to this. i thought i'm just attracted to him as he is my best friend but its been 7 months and i'm not able to move on yet. Everyday just gets terrible for me. emotionally and mentally.
I don't know if i should call this anxiety or depression but i get this weird kind of feeling when i'm with both of them. sad, low, overwhelmed, the idea that how can i connect with him so easily and still not be dating him or being together hurts me terribly.
i cant explain this feeling its so terrible that i constantly feel burdened with emotions and the fact that i cannot get someone like him keeps haunting me day and night.
it has eventually started to affect my health. i fall sick very often, i keep crying until i feel light and normal, i cannot concentrate on my actual life, i feel like running away somewhere far and starting a new life with new people. At the worst i even think of killing myself but is worth taking the risk??
i don't want to do that because i love my life and want to spend my life loving someone. i just don't know how to get out of this.
i just spoke to him 2 days back and told him how i have been feeling all the time. like especially since past 1 month. he even said that he did noticed me ignoring him for the past few days. so i told him what i have been going through. he anyway knows i have been telling him regularly.
I decided and told him lets not interact for a month or so, lets not call up each other as he does it every evening, calling me asking about me and sharing his daily deets. yes we are so close and it hurts to do all these things keeping myself away from him.
I basically confronted him that i feel lonely, uncomfortable and left out when i'm with both of them unlike before how we THE TRIO used to hang out. Its not the same for me anymore!! i have changed a lot.
I just feel terribly helpless as i'm not able to stop to thinking about him or anything that's related to him.
am i even normal?? will i be fine anytime soon.. i want to bounce back to what i was.
a easy going girl having a that one guy best friend with whom can share and talk any rubbish without any fear of losing him.
I don't want to loose him. i don't want to die in this sea of emotion and loose my self control.
SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME!!! PLEASE.